Let's finally set the record straight.
It's not that I have not tried to emphasize that I only like girls and that it wasn't really my choice to like girls (like how many people did not choose to be homosexual or heterosexual to begin with). I actually did try to set the record straight so many times already. But some people would rather have their own versions of the "convenient truth" ignoring what I have been saying for the nth time. So, here's a final plea to these people to listen to the truth or to the inconvenient truth these people seemingly cannot swallow. Here's nothing but cold, brutal truth.
TRUTH NO. 1
I am straight and I advocate for gender equality - that gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and straight men and women have equal dignity as human beings and, therefore, no one should be discriminated because of their gender.
These statements are not inconsistent with each other. You do not have to be a woman to advocate for equality laws or to be a feminist. You also do not need to live below the poverty line to know that there is something wrong with our system of capital and to passionately work for the eradication of structural poverty. In like manner, I do not have to be a member of the LGBT to know that they suffer unfair treatment in so many societies. I just have to read/listen, understand, and empathize.
I can be a supporter of the LGBT even if I am not an LGBT myself. Get over it.
TRUTH NO. 2
I am straight and I have a gay best friend and close gay friends.
Like how some average Joe has a girl best friend, I have a gay best friend. Like how this average Joe and his girl best friend are not together (romantically), I and my gay best friend are not together (romantically). Like how this average Joe simply enjoys the company of his girl best friend and there's nothing more to that, I simply enjoy the company of my gay best friend and there's nothing more to that.
And like how some average Bob likes to chill with his best bros over coffee/beer for hours, I like to chill with my gay best friend over coffee/beer for hours.
I can have a gay best friend without plotting to be with him (romantically) in the future. I can have a gay best friend without being gay myself. Get over it.
TRUTH NO. 3
I do not find it insulting to be called gay. I find it utterly insulting when people do not believe what I say about my own sexuality.
There is nothing offensive in being called gay. Being gay does not undermine humanity! Whatever gender the person has, he/she is as human as everybody else.
What is insulting is when people do not believe when one says he/she is straight when it is incredibly clear that there's nothing to be ashamed about when one is indeed a homosexual. For instance, if I am gay, I will be more than proud to announce it to the entire world without anybody asking me. No one has to push me to tell that to the world!
Sexuality is an important component of identity. For me, it defines my lifestyle and fundamental choices - like the choice of the person whom I will love and the self project that I will want everybody else to appreciate. No one should be hindered to openly show his/her sexuality. Definitely, no one should be calling bullshit to a golden piece of truth like, "I am straight."
If you do not believe me, then you certainly do not trust me. That is perhaps the greatest insult I could ever feel. They say trust is earned. Should it be diminished because of one-sided gossip?
TRUTH NO. 4
It is also unfair for a straight guy, even if we live in a man's world, to be "gayzoned" by girls he like just because of gossip.
Let us face it. It hurts to be "friendzoned". In like manner, it hurts to be "gayzoned" - being rejected by a girl you probably like just because she hears that you are gay and she might probably think that you are just trying to make her a cover girlfriend.
This is incredibly unfair because you manufacture another person's decision about another person out of the "convenient truths" you weave from your own biased perspective.
True, the girl should not have judged before knowing the guy. However, relationships, or attempting to start one, is an incredibly sensitive topic in this part of the world (the Philippines). Please consider that.
TRUTH NO. 5
There are so many versions of the truth. It does not mean that only one is true even if these versions conflict with each other, although essentially only one is objectively true. However, portraying only one as the absolute truth without considering other versions is unfair. Portraying only one as the absolute truth with vague descriptions is evil.
This truth is a bit more specific to a recent situation of mine. You see, I had this close closeted friend before. We were incredibly close. I saw him as how I saw all of my other bros - as a brother, with all its macho connotations. He said he was a straight bro. There was no reason to not believe him back then lest I insult him. He perhaps saw my friendly disposition differently (I cannot be sure, well, until his version of our friendship came out).
Perhaps it was an innocent misinterpretation. There was no fault worthy of rebuke there. However, to portray a friendship in vague terms which then elicited vague ideas about that friendship from other people's perspectives, for example, romantic or sexual notions from the terms "lampungan" and "consensual", is purely evil.
I appreciate other perspectives of a story. As much as possible, no matter how it hurts, I would like to read or listen to them. However, this is plainly unfair. Aside from the fact that there was only one side of the story shown, it was not the least bit clear as to where the line in "lampungan" was drawn. There is always a better way to tell this story without unfairly distorting the picture. It should have been clearer. It should have been more sensitive - not censored, but sensitive.
This is what separates people with honor and good taste from people who simply deserve disgust.
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(Also note: If you're asleep, and you cannot object to what is being done to you during sleep, then that's not consensual by any means - no matter how much you sleep talk.)
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